My helicar refuses to function.
I have just familiarised myself with all her foibles and now she decides to down tools and remain stoically in the format I first created – a gleaming, shiny, cherry red Jaguar XK8.
The message is clear, the time for observation, review and searching for … whatever it was I was searching for; this time is finished, gone. It is time to get on with it.
I will confess to you all that I have been having an internal debate with myself of late:
“To write or not to write”
My helicar rides have looked down and shown a hotchpotch approach to my writing ambitions with no clear pathway being taken within my Writers World. My blog floats above the world like a living breathing cloud travelling over the fantastic lands and turbulent sea offering its irregular and often irrelevant view of the world below and my journey.
I had been considering closing down the Writers World and exiting from this rich pageant of life, withdrawing my professed ambitions to be a writer.
I have ridden that particular beast and tamed him into submission, for I now understand my future role in the World of Reality – I will be a successful writer.
My blog is a more complex and subtle beast and today I face a different question:
“To Blog Or Not To Blog”
If I am to be a writer then my blog should be my marketing platform, my public image, my professional showcase – blah blah blah. You’ve all read the books and articles you know what I mean.
But … there is always a but, or as my Dad taught me, two sides to every coin.
My blog’s flip side takes the form of a petulant pout, a stamp of a foot and a chill in the eyes as I assess the counter argument:
“Yeah but, if I am to be a successful writer do I want to be me or a cardboard cut-out? This is my journey warts and all. Everything I have spoken of so honestly in my blog is the real me, it is and has been my journey.”
My helicar rides and the wonderful Psychologies Magazine have identified an area of concern. I am a perfectionist, I constantly question my work and whilst I love it and can see it’s merit – it rarely leaves me feeling:
“Wow this is good enough to be published”.
Furthermore I am a rule follower. I have taken the challenge of a creative writing course and I therefore “follow the designated path” dictated within the course framework.
Put these two factors or personality traits together and hey presto, you get a circular path spinning round and round – an eternal frenzy of chasing your own tail. Hmmm is that an apt description of my Writers World?
The only area within the Writers World where my perfectionist streak does not rule is my blog, which openly and actively defies all the rules and rarely sees the inside of an airing cupboard.
The only area where I have stepped outside the rules is my blog, which was started alongside the comments and example of my peers from the creative writing group on Facebook.
I pose this question to you all:
“To Blog Or Not To Blog”
Should the warts and all, heartfelt irrational rambling that is my blog continue?
I may have found my answer but before the final decision is made your comments please.
Until next time…